That's quite a title isn't it? Sorry, no photos at the moment. I have ten minutes before I start getting ready to go to my office job, that every day I am surprised I still have.
I've been thinking about death, because I just experienced it. Death, loss, and the ephemerality (Is that a word? Probably not, my spell check is telling me it isn't) of everything we have and hold dear. My cat died.... painfully, after licking a rock we believe was radioactive. It was awful.
Then, as I was preparing to figure out a way to back up my computer with little money, the hard drive just suddenly went poof. It's dead, and I didn't save anything. At the moment the most heartbreaking part is losing all the photos of the cat that just died!!! I was pleased to find just 6 photos of her on my mom's computer, which is what I am using now.
It's hard to suddenly have things... GONE... and living beings that you love. It's like a hole. I mean it is one of those things we all experience. We'll lose everything completely at some point. I don't know what happens when we die, but whatever happens, as they say, "you can't take it with you". Which means if we are somehow conscious, we lose all of it. I guess being a painter is somehow comforting, because an oil painting can last for generations after I am gone. But that same oil painting too will go some day, whether it is 50 years or 5000, it will go, too. Woah, what a thought, in all the changes in the last, oh, 2000 years, what will things be like in 5000 years? We can't even fathom it!!!
Well, this was a pointless rant, and there goes my alarm telling me it's time to go get ready for my stupid job. Pray he fires me amiably, so I can get unemployment and get some art done. And soon, the sooner the better. If I go to work today and he tells me I'm fired, and I get to come right back home, what a celebration that will be!!!
Wednesday, October 28, 2009
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